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The Sigma X-style 14 MINI showcased by Leather Gloves and their Owner

If you couldn't tell, I'm not a phone reviewer.

This is a phone I have been using for over a year. Yes, it's plastic, and it's basic compared to those from the Golden Age, but if it is good enough for 99% of use cases, then I think it is worth continuing to support the dumbphone economy.

The brand is Ukrainian, and is not available elsewhere officially. The same company makes color dumbphones and smartphones, but I chose this one just to go all the way.

  • 2 SIM slots (one regular, one mini)
  • 1-bit display with blue tint
  • Audio-focused design:
    • Good speakers
    • FM radio, though signal strength is subpar
    • File explorer
  • JPEG viewer (see video)
  • External SD card with up to 32GB
  • Bluetooth support
  • Strong flashlight
  • "Power saving mode", toggled by holding the 0 button
  • English + Ukrainian languages (my instance also contains Russian, but as it is from before the war, who knows if it stayed)
  • No games, browsers nor BS
  • GSM only (2G)
  • Questionable UI design
  • A "click" sound after each vibration
  • Phone decides to shut down after a few minutes of charging
  • Only Latin and Cyrillic scripts

Most of these are at most slight inconveniences. What's the worst that a click sound will do? Wake you from bed? That's a good thing. Should there be an invasion of monsters who possessed superhearing, the vibration itself would alert them, forget the click. And if they possessed supervision, shine 'em with your flashlight they to pwnify